Teens are so used to talking about what they are good at in terms of school subjects that they often find it hard to express who they are and what they are good at outside of this.

For example, your teen might say that they are not good at English because they do not enjoy writing analytical essays about Shakespeare. But they might be able to win every argument, be super creative or be awesome at engaging or entertaining a crowd – all talents that are so needed in the world.  

I always think of a talent as something that comes easily – when you are doing something and before you know it, hours have gone by and you have been unaware of the passing of time.

Try this quick activity. Think of a time when your teen is “in flow” – when they are so engrossed in a task that they do not notice the time (yes, I hear you, it might be gaming. If this is the case, fear not. I’ll explain later).

What is it about this particular activity that lights them up?

What is it that motivates them?

Which of their natural talents are they using when they do this task?

If it’s art, singing or dancing that your teen is focused on, perhaps their talent is attention to detail, observational skills or creative expression.

If it’s creating TikTok videos, perhaps their talent is engaging an audience, video editing or creative thinking.

If it’s gaming, their talent may be intuiting strategies and solutions, spatial awareness or logical thinking and problem-solving. Your teen may have similar talents if they enjoy building their own computer.

It is highly likely that you will learn more about your teen by observing them when they are in flow than you could ever learn from a school report full of numbers.

The problem is that talent often goes unrecognised.

We tell ourselves (and our teens) that we ought to be concentrating on something “more important” or “more meaningful”.

How often have you heard (or said) the following:

• There’s no money in that
• Work isn’t supposed to be fun
• That’s just a pipe dream – it’s never going to happen
• You need to be more realistic

But here’s the awesome thing: if your teen focuses on their talent, life can become easy.

As Mark Twain famously said: “Find a job you enjoy doing and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”

The world of work is changing – people are far more likely to have portfolio careers where they do not just one “job” but have multiple income streams. There are more entrepreneurs than ever before. The fact is that we are preparing our teens for a world of work that does not yet exist. If we allow them to play and experiment with what comes naturally, who knows where it might lead?

If your teen is not enjoying school and you feel that they could do with some support to identify their talents, unlock their motivation and find direction, I offer a 15 minute complimentary chat. Let’s have a conversation and work out how we can work together to support them.